Actual doctor's comments on patients' charts

[Mystery]

Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

On the second day, the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely.

The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1993.

The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

The patient refused an autopsy.

The patient has no past history of suicides.

Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital.

Patient's past medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

She is numb from her toes down.

While in the ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.

Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.

Patient was alert and unresponsive.

I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

Skin: Somewhat pale but present.

Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart stopped, and he was feeling better.

The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of gas and crashed.

When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.

The patient expired on the floor uneventfully.

[Bobc11]

Well that's disturbing...

[Popeye]