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Food Safety for new Bachelors.

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The may be some that are just starting out in the lonely road ahead, or have been down the road and have just been left in the dust.

Well here are a few cooking tips for new bachelors, it will keep you out of the bathroom and in front of the TV looking for that good game.

Tip #1. Peanut butter sandwiches are good for you, but a good staple diet of other foods will keep your pants from falling down as you loose too much weight.

Tip #2. Tuna does not look green when it comes out of the can, noticing this can keep you from making that nasty trip to the hospital.

Tip #3. when using mayonnaise to make that tuna sandwich the mayo dose not have lumps or green stuff in it (if you keep your knife clean first) noticing this will keep you from making that nasty trip again.

Tip #4. Boiling water, water will boil in a small pan in about 7 to 9 minuets (this depending on the size of pan and the altitude you are at) set a timer and go do something else, watching it and waiting for it to boil will just waist your time, a dash of salt will get the water a bit hotter, but don’t use too much as it will raise the time required to boil, the higher in altitude you live the water will boil faster but will be at a lower then normal temperature a dash or more of salt will raise the temperature of the water so the food your cooking will be done faster.

Tip #5. Spatulas, they are used for most pancake and egg flipping and stirring things you are cooking, there are 3 classifications of spatulas.

One is the plastic kind, these are good for eggs and pancakes they are made out of non-stick plastic but will stick to the pan if left in it too long.

The second type is metal; these are good for hamburgers and other foods that the melted plastic ones wont flip just right, they are also good for out on the BBQ.

The last kind of spatula is the floor and counter type, these are usually metal and have bent handles, chips taken out of the blades or badly bent blades, they are used to get the stuck food off the floor and counter when cleaning. (Yes kids you do have to still clean)

Note: Do not use a metal spatula on a linoleum floor, just soak the spilled food with water it will soften it up and make it easier to remove. (see tip # on floor cleaning.)

Tip #6. Refrigerator safety, not all foods you make or cook will last forever in the fridge, if that tuna sandwich you made last month is sending up smoke signals then call National Geographic as you have discovered a new intelligent life form, most tuna sandwiches have a eatable life span of two or three days if inside a sandwich bag and in the fridge and not too close to the 2 week old meat loaf.

Milk, yes milk does have an expiration date, although it doesn’t quite expire on the date on the carton, I have unopened milk that is 2 weeks older then the date marked on the carton but I like my milk thick.

Eggs, if the cluck when you open them then they should be BBQ’d and not used for cooking something else, eggs if kept cold will last 2 to 3 weeks (if kept away from the tuna) past the expiration date, don’t scramble or fry the eggs and put them in the fridge for later use, they don’t taste too good after a week.

Other foods kept in the fridge should not move when poked with a stick, it it hisses back the call someone like an exterminator, anything with green or purple fuzz on it (unless its road kill) should be thrown out.

Tip #7. Cleaning, yes kids you have to clean or those guys from one of those reality shows will show up and put you to shame.

It is best to start with the kitchen, this will keep you feeling fit (out of the hospital) to tackle the rest of the house, dishes can be cleaned in that thing under the counter called a dish washer, (big square metal thing) this can also be used to clean the floor (later in this section) it is best to soak the dishes first as ketchup that has hardened for more then a week will take the metal spatula to get it off, it is best to rinse the dish off before stacking it for a later cleaning, I keep mine in 1 week 2 week and 3 week sections, this makes it easier to tell what ones go in the dish washer first.

Use of the dish washer, if you have one (if you don’t then is best to buy paper plates) you should arrange the dishes so the water will get to both sides, just laying them in there will not work too good as only the top and bottom and some of the sides of the stack will get clean, the little pegs on the dish rack in the washer helps with the arrangement.

Note: a good way to keep things organized on the “what is a clean dish?” part is to stack the dirty ones in the sink and use the ones out of the dish washer first, when it is empty then you can put the dirty ones from the sink in it for a cycle or two. (use paper plates till the cycle is done)

As far as cleaning the rest of the house its best to invite Mom (or your sister or girlfriend) over for a dinner. (Mom works best)

Oh about the floor cleaning with the dish washer, I found this by accident, I used normal liquid dish washing soap (yes they have special soap for the dish washer) in the dish washer as I had run out, I used the same amount as the dish washer normal soap stuff, and went outside, I came back in about a half hour later to find the kitchen full of suds, I used the shop vac (should be on the bachelors kitchen tools list) to suck up the suds, and to my surprise the kitchen floor never looked so clean, it is advisable to those that may try this to watch out for the carpet in the living room, I got lucky as the suds hadn’t reached that far yet, keep an eye on this when trying it out.

Well I have run out of steam, I will be posting more tips later on, anyone else with some good ideas for use bachelors please feel free to post them, but be sure to test them out if they are a shortcut or something as we don’t like those long drives to the emergency room with those terrible stomach cramps and towels stuffed down the back side of our shorts.

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