The end of the world

[gonzo]

God was fed up. In a crash of thunder He yanked up to Heaven three influential humans: Barack Obama, Vladimir Putin and Larry Ellison.

 

"The human race is a complete disappointment," God boomed. "You each have one week to prepare your followers for the end of the world." With another crash of thunder they found themselves back on Earth.

 

Obama immediately called his cabinet. "I have good news and bad news," he announced grimly. "The good news is that there is a God. The BAD news is, God's really mad and plans to end the world in a week."

 

In Russia, Putin announced to parliament, "Comrades, I have bad news and worse news. The bad news is that we were wrong: there is a God after all. The worse news is God's mad and is going to end the world in a week."

 

Meanwhile, Larry Ellison called a meeting of his top engineers. "I have good news and better news. The good news is that God considers me one of the three most influential men on Earth," he beamed. "The better news is we stop these damned Java updates."

[David H. Lipman]